Are You Gonna Get That?

You know what's disgusting? People talking while they're chewing. You know what else is disgusting? Someone chewing with their mouth wide open. You know what's more disgusting than that??? When food flies from someone's mouth and onto you.

A friend and I were having lunch one day... Well she was having lunch and I was busying myself with Sudoku... And she's a talker. As she babbled on about what her ex-friend wore to Mojo last weekend, a piece of pie flew out of her mouth and onto my hand. It didn't register at that moment, I just stared at her for a bit then...

Me: Um... [looks down] 

Rocket Launcher: Happen?

Me: Really? Did you not see that?

Rocket Launcher: See what?

Me: [looks down]

The look on her face was one of sheer horror. I think she grossed herself out... And as she's sitting there debating in her head what to do, I felt as though her spit was getting under my skin and... *shudder*

Rocket Launcher: Do you want a tissue or something? Cause that's -

Me: What? Nasty?? Get that...

Rocket Launcher: I don't wanna touch it...

So I did what any reasonable person would do - I wiped it on her shirt.

We sat in silence for a while, she pushing her food around in the carton and I fiddling with my pen, until I made some excuse and left. We haven't eaten lunch with just the two of us since then and when ever we're eating in a group I sit as far away from her as possible #itsjusttooweird

And people!!! Please, Please, Please!!! Keep the food in your mouth hidden :/ no one wants to see that...